Tuesday, September 22, 2009

RSVP


Definition: French abbreviation for répondez s'il vous plaît (please reply).

Over the past few years I have noticed that people tend to ignore the RSVP on an invitation. I confess that I’m guilty of it myself when I get invited to one of those parties where I’m supposed to buy something. I tend to wait until the last minute to decide if I’m going (because I don’t really want to) and/or I simply tuck the invitation somewhere and forget about it. It isn’t the right thing to do, but I justify it by the fact that the hostess wants something from me and most likely will just be serving drinks and cookies anyway. If I show up or not won’t really matter to her, other than in her sales figures. Really, there is no excuse for my being rude.

However, when someone is having an actual party, I do RSVP. It is really important to the hostess that you do so. We’ve all been there. We’ve invited 20 people to our homes and we’ve only heard from 8 of them. How much food do you buy? How many bottles of wine? How many places do you set at the tables? Do you call the person and ask them if they are coming or is that too pushy?

I have learned that you should never assume that someone isn’t coming, simply because they didn’t call. My own opinion is that if you haven’t heard from your guests and it is time to buy the food or prepare party favors, call them. If they are too rude to let you know, it certainly isn’t too pushy to call and ask them. I resent it when I have to do that.

I have a friend who recently hosted a party. Two people volunteered to come early to help, they didn’t show up early. People who said they were coming didn’t show up. People who said they couldn’t come, did. For the most part, no one came on time and a meal was being served. Luckily my friend is the type who can “go with the flow” and she got through it. It is so difficult for a hostess when those things happen. It takes two minutes to make a phone call. It can save your hostess time and money if you do so. The way I see it, people don’t have that many parties anymore. If I’m lucky enough to be on someone’s guest list, I want them to know I appreciated the invitation.
 

6 comments:

just me said...

This is a lost art. Especially by me. I never do it. I am so RUDE.

PS: I'm blogrolling you. Others must know where they can get all their questions answered...

Someone's Mom said...

JM-everyone is rude these days. I think until you are the one sitting at home wondering why you have all that food and no people...or all those people and no food, you just don't realize how rude it is! As I said, I've been guilty of it on occasion myself.

Thanks for the blogroll!

BrightenedBoy said...

People are very inconsiderate. I think your reaction to invitations is very sweet by the way. I feel the same. I'm really glad you've started blogging.

Someone's Mom said...

BB-you made my night. Thank you.

FrugalMom said...

Oh yes, this is something I have thought about a whole lot. We do not have many parties any more, but fortunately my family used to be pretty good about the rsvp. South Florida is a whole other ball game though, and I have the feeling that the idea of RSVP has been lost down here.

Someone's Mom said...

Frug-it seems to be lost everywhere, and it is so hard for the person having the party!